Thanksgiving with my family in Dallas
My first Thanksgiving away from family in a different city. Sure, it may not seem like a big deal to anyone who reads this, but it is to me. Today marks one week living here in NYC. Let me tell you, it is one of the longest weeks ever. When I was back home, waiting for this day to come took forever! Now that I am here, each day just keeps getting slower every minute, day by day. But I know this is a temporary feeling. Everything will get better soon. It’s just that the holidays are here now and I am here. Alone. A feeling that I thought I could handle…
Sitting here, just thinking I could always pack up my bags and move back. If I did that, what was the point of moving here then? My purpose of moving to the city was to get my writing career started. Back home, I was entitled of saying “I can do it. I can deal with the hustle.” It felt like nothing since I was still living at home with my comfort room, comfort steady pay check and comfort life. I have cried every day since I have moved here. Second guessing everything I was doing. Now that I’m actually facing it, I kept thinking I couldn’t do it, I wanted to go back to my comfort life.
But I have to take control. I can do this. I wanted this. BIG GIRL PANTS ON.
The main reason why I wanted to write this piece was to write all the things I have been grateful for and will always be thankful for:
- I am thankful for my family. Set me free and had faith in my wings. Helping me through whatever is going on.
- I am thankful for my amazing group of friends who made me laugh, proud and loved.
- I am thankful for Dallas. Being my home for 25 years and reminding me that it was really a great place.
- I am thankful for being alive. Waking every day despite my attitude towards change.
- I am thankful for water and food.
- I am thankful for little moments with people.
- I am thankful for books. Words mean so much to me because they come from our hearts or in our fantasy land.
- I am thankful for the people who were a part of life but not anymore. You helped me grow.
- I am thankful for Tacos and Wine.
- I am thankful for my new journey in NYC.